Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Promised a photo-filled post and here it goes.
I'm actually posting while watching MAMA hahaha XDD
First day of freedom and freedom never felt better :DD
even though I screwed up today's paper :/
I couldn't have done any better anyways,
the paper was just plain difficult -.-"
Anyways,
here's the photos taken on the daddy's post-birthday celebration!^^
Daddy and Mummy^^
They are so cute, I swear!^^
And below is a spam of the photos of the 3 of us,
all because Andy took an uber long time to get it right -.-"
Like a kid -.-"
:DD
I like this best heehee! :DD
With Andy
And Alicia(:
Love us(:
Unsurprisingly,
indeed even after the exams my heart is not at ease.
I feel that there'll be things that are coming that ain't pleasant and that now that the academics are no longer an issue of worry,
other worries will start appearing from nowhere.
I just want some peace,
just a little bit,
for just a little while.
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Monday, November 28, 2011
Have this urge to blog but I have to study for now :\
A picture post is coming up soon!;)
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Friday, November 25, 2011
After much effort and sleepless nights,
it's finally Friday,
and the third day of my finals.
A part of me feels the excitement of impending freedom,
whereas another part fears it.
Because somehow I feel that it wouldn't turn out as wonderful as I imagined it to be.
Somehow,
there's just this bad feeling :(
I hope it's just me and my paranoid thinking.
Anyways,
I'm taking the Mental Health exams today,
one of the few mods which I have more of an interest to,
since one of my first few aspirations (besides a farmer (and I still haven't given up on that dream)) was to be a psychologist,
because issues pertaining to the mind has always been intriguing.
So,
I hope I'll be able to do well today(:
unlike yesterday's paper,
which was beyond horrible.
But I've gotta admit that I didn't put in as much effort as I did for the others in preparing for that paper,
also partly due to the lack of quality and adequate information in the notes provided -.-"
Lol.
An issue has been stressing me out quite a bit lately,
even though I know I shouldn't give it much thought right now cause I'm still in the midst of the exam period.
To be able to be within an arm's reach to the people of your dreams,
isn't that something everyone seeks?
But then again,
I'm not the only one dreaming that dream.
The competition is so intense I feel that the chances are slim hahaha.
Shall just do my best and let fate do the rest.
Come to think of it,
I actually have another issue at the back of my head.
And sometimes when tiredness sets in at night,
I couldn't help but think about it.
Tomorrow's the day we're meeting,
after 2 weeks.
Once again I'm experiencing the contradiction of my feelings.
Should I be happy?
And if I should, why am I feeling this uneasy?
My logical mind gives me plenty of reasons not to do what my heart says.
Because I don't want to regret my decision,
because I don't want to undergo the same pain,
because I don't want to be part of another deceit game,
because deep down I know if I were to make this decision based on feelings only,
it might not be a happy ending.
But in the end,
the problem still lies with me.
Because I don't have the confidence to make this work,
even though right now we are both happy,
but who can promise it'll be the same years later,
or even months later?
In the past I've never given much thought to all the negativity before and allowed my heart and feelings to take reign of many things,
but as I grow up,
I find that it's not that feasible.
It's easy to fall in love,
too easy,
and we all lose ourselves in the present,
that we forget,
forget to think about the future.
I don't simply want to secure the present,
I want to know that there's also a future...
I guess eventually fate will decide,
I just hope till then we'll keep things this way.
It's for the best.
After today's paper I'll be 3/4 relieved haha XDD
It's too early to prepare for Christmas but I'm all prepared for the holidays! :DD
Until next time,
everybody have a great Friday!^^
Chillax and lay back^^
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Been taking selcas all morning.
Camwhoring is indeed not easy -.-"
A BIG BIG THANK YOU to my beloved Alicia for helping out^^
LOVE YOU LOADS <333
Shall share one today heehee! :DD
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!^^
Remember when I called him this morning I said "生日快乐"
and he heard 生鸡蛋?!?! -.-"
One of these days I'll get him to have his hearing checked.
Lol.
Anyway dad is working overtime tonight so other than the cake and cards,
we won't be able to celebrate much today :/
But we're making up on Saturday instead,
which means I'll be spending the entire day out on Saturday :/
He's booking out on Friday^^
Anyways,
it's been quite a while since I updated.
I guess nobody reads it anymore,
except for myself hahaha.
But even I myself hardly have the chance to visit XDD
But even so, I'll just update now and then.
It's like my online diary lol.
I just had my first paper yesterday afternoon(:
Before that I was really stressed,
and this hasn't really happened before,
cause I would wake up in the middle of night because of some weird nightmare about the exams and begin to worry alot.
But,
I'm thankful that the paper yesterday was manageable and has given me a confidence boost(:
The next paper will take place on Thursday so I can't afford to slacken either.
But I guess 30 minutes of the time here won't make too much of an impact heehee.
Ahhh I just can't wait for the end of the exams.
Even though this time I've got only 4 mods to study for,
it feels as if it's too long,
or maybe I'm just too excited about the activities after the exams^^
My dates are more or less fully booked by now.
I end on the 29th Nov and immediately after that we've got a mahjong session at Mei's place.
30th I'm going over to Cass's place with Shus for a sleepover^^
1st I'm prob going out with Buddy(:
On the 2nd I'm spending the day with the girls to celebrate Vy's and Daph's birthday.
Saturday there's Denise's 21st birthday celebration,
and on the 4th... ^^
Heehee!
My hubby's brothers are coming LOL.
And on the 5th my 2-week-attachments would begin.
I wonder if I'll be more tired then than I am now.
Lol XDD
And after the exams I guess I'll be just as busy too :/
On the 17th I'm going to an elderly home to carol^^
We did that last year and it's such a joy to be helping out and seeing those happy faces^^
I hope it'll be as successful this year round too^^
And also we've got Mei's birthday which we're probably gonna have to celebrate on the 16th.
LOL.
I don't even want to start on the activities after 18th >.<
It'll be near Christmas and I wish to spend some time with the people I love too,
but it seems time is barely on my side.
But still,
I have plans to make this season of love special^^
Christmas to me has always been a special occasion,
but mainly because I get to receive presents and eat good food,
but from now,
it's special because there's a meaning to everything,
and I'm happy to have found it,
or rather,
it's found me^^
Lol despite having so many activities lined up across my holidays,
I'm glad I'm spending it wisely I guess(:
I shall end here now,
gotta be heading back to the books now(:
Till next time,
take care everybody!^^
Are you anticipating Christmas as much as I am?
Heeheehee!
Whether you are or not,
I hope you feel much love from the people you love and love you in this special season^^
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Monday, November 14, 2011
Doing a post on the first day of study week doesn't seem like the right way to go.
Haahaa.
But being the diligent me,
I've already finished what is to be revised today(:
And in fact,
I'm actually ahead of schedule,
and sunbathing in pride now hahaha XDD
Anyways I thought I'd come in and write something,
before time erases this website from your minds and mine.
Lately,
how do I explain this?
I guess life as of late can only be summed up in one word- contradiction.
I'm happy and yet I'm also upset.
I want this, but I also want that.
I kinda like him, but I can't be with him.
Yes,
just when I believe I finally found something I want to hold onto,
and someone who feels the same way too,
something called "directions" had to appear.
Because we're potentially moving in different directions,
I really doubt if we'll end up in the same destination.
And I don't wish to start something that I can't see a future in,
because this is important to me...
And because he's important to me too,
so we can't afford to get together and then leave halfway,
because that would be too painful,
yes,
much more painful than if we hadn't started at all.
I've been putting much effort into work,
into going on and on about revising,
just to keep the thoughts away from my mind.
But still,
the thoughts come back haunting each night,
and even with the insecurities I feel,
with the fear that I might like him more and more that I'd let everything else fall to the back of my head and just go ahead,
I still carry on the wait.
I know I have to put an end to this somehow,
but maybe it's just not right now.
I don't want this to be on the top of my to-fret list now,
cause there're other things like the finals I have to worry about.
I miss the boys alittle more today...
Can't be happier I have these distractions in my life.
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Wednesday, November 09, 2011
*DIES OF HAPPINESS*
2/5 IS BETTER THAN 0/5 HAHAHAHA!
THE MONTH OF DECEMBER'S GONNA BE BUSY BUSY BUSY!^^
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
The call last night was rather unexpected.
But I won't deny that I wasn't pleasantly surprised.
I know we shouldn't head down this road,
for I know not where we'll go.
But for now,
I just want to live today and not think about tomorrow,
so wherever you go,
you can be sure that I'll follow.
If you're going to carry on with these sweet little tricks up your sleeve,
I don't know how long can I keep those feelings in.
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Saturday, November 05, 2011
Yesterday was so much fun I didn't want it to end(:
Everything seemed to pass smoothly.
From the CHA skills assessment to the outing later in the day,
it was almost amazing how wonderful things went.
I never really agreed with the possibility of a close friendship between a boy and a girl but after yesterday,
I think it's possible.
In the past,
certain things happened at the wrong time,
and perhaps age made us all foolish and also a little immature.
But now,
I can safely say that you're someone important to me,
and that I'll never let this friendship sway.
Until fate decides to change anything,
I want our relationship to stay this way(:
In a way,
I really like you now, my friend,
Ivan Tan(:
Take care of yourself when you're in there.
I'll be waiting for our next meetup heehee^^
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Tuesday, November 01, 2011
After her return from chalet,
I've a wall for a sister.
It's really quite funny.
-With All My Heart, Alina ;
Arrived a gemini with a great deal of divided personalities.
For one thing, I can laugh at one moment and be upset the next.
But Im not the hardest person to get along with, certainly.
I came to be me on 10th June 1991.
Spent the last nighteen years of my life in attempts to piece myself together, and is still desperately trying.
Family and friends are my life.
At least that's the way it is till a boyfriend comes along XD
Anyway, icecream's my addiction, my medicine, my must-have.
Now you know how to make me happy.
I dont need expensive gifts I just want a true heart.
I'm majorly affected by the people around me.
Can't say if it's a blessing or a curse, 'cause the little things people do can either make my day or simply make it worse.
Just give me a smile, and I'll return one to you^^
KimJaeJoong: My Prince, MY Love, MY JAEBABY 
