Underneath The Smile, The Pain Resides

THE GIRL

Arrived a gemini with a great deal of divided personalities. For one thing, I can laugh at one moment and be upset the next. But Im not the hardest person to get along with, certainly. I came to be me on 10th June 1991. Spent the last nighteen years of my life in attempts to piece myself together, and is still desperately trying. Family and friends are my life. At least that's the way it is till a boyfriend comes along XD Anyway, icecream's my addiction, my medicine, my must-have. Now you know how to make me happy. I dont need expensive gifts I just want a true heart. I'm majorly affected by the people around me. Can't say if it's a blessing or a curse, 'cause the little things people do can either make my day or simply make it worse. Just give me a smile, and I'll return one to you^^

KimJaeJoong: My Prince, MY Love, MY JAEBABY

LEAVE

2E1`05 4E1`07
NUS NURSING
BUDDY
AIKSONG
BEETENG
BOONYANG
CHUANLIANG
DINGSIAN
CINDY
ERVIN
GUOTING
HONGJIE
HUILI
IRA
JEAN
JINWEN
JINXIAN
JINYI
JOCELYN
JUNRI
KARYAN
KELLIE
LUTING
MADELEINE
MINGHAO
OLIVIA
QIAN
REUBEN
SAMANTHA
SHAWN
SHENN
SHIQI
SHIRLEY
SOOKYING
STELLA
TAOYAN
TOMMY
VANICE
WEIFANG
WEIJIE
WEIXIAN
WENDY
XUANXIN
YANGMENG

DOWN MEMORY LANE

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TALK TO ME

CREDITS

DESIGNER: ice angel

Brushes: aethereality.net

Friday, January 29, 2010

friday.
like finally...

when will i see you again?

-With All My Heart, Alina ;

Thursday, January 28, 2010

im off today,
that is if my boss don't message me at 12.30 later to head down,
for there's a possibility of my colleague being unwell.
but if he doesn't, then yay im off today! XD
actually the original plan of today was to go fetch alicia and have lunch together.
but alicia has a ligament problem with her left knee.
so she isn't able to attend school for 4 days.
now she's all bandaged up and limping.
her knee was so swollen the other day.
the doc had to draw blood out of her knee to make the swell go down.
she was really brave.
i couldnt have gone through that without knocking myself out first.
we were the last patient that day lol.
it was 11.30pm when we got home.
and as it would've taken her light years to get back home,
my dad carried her.
[he looked more dead than alicia when we got home]
but i havent seen my dad so man since i was 9? when i started noticing other boys instead. XD
anyway, if it's any much of a comfort,
no PE no NAPFA for her till june. XD

since it's my off-day today,
im gonna do something of value today.
im gonna do some housekeeping. ^^
it's about time too. XD

no matter how much i try to avoid,
you presence still haunt me when im weakest,
reminding me that you once exist,
in me.

我想抹去的你,
总不经意间出现在我梦里...

-With All My Heart, Alina ;

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

i just visited wx's blog and saw something really funny.
at least i think it is. XD

"i'm working at MEIJI now.
the famous chocolate and yan yan BRAND warehouse.

get to eat free yan yan and cracker today.
but one thing i'm damn pissed off with.is the attire for the job.

I LOOK LIKE A FCUK-ED UP DORAEMON WITH THE FULL ATTIRE GIVEN.
WTF?!!!
FREAKING UGLY ATTIRE. GOSH!"

LOL.

-With All My Heart, Alina ;

Monday, January 25, 2010

sigh...
it's another monday.
sighx3.
i can feel the endorphin draining out of me.
and when everything is quiet and subtle like it is now,
all the stress, pain and frustration comes back to me, as it's always been,
just that they had merely been hiding.
life feels so mundane now.
everyday for me is simply waiting for the sun to rise then set again.
waiting for the time to pass and then to pass again.
i feel so lost.
like there isn't even a goal.
nothing.
nothing to look forward to.
nothing to work forward to.
im just running in circles.
over and over again.
i see a black&white portrait when i look into the mirror.
so colourless.
i don't know how long i can keep up of this tiresome routine.
i feel as if i might just crumble now.
like how my comfort zone once crumbled.
all im trying to say is,
i need a refuge.

the more i find out, the less i know.

-With All My Heart, Alina ;

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

holla everybody!
havent exactly got the time to blog lately,
mainly cause i've been out morning-evening everyday since sunday.
and i figured i'd spend the night with family instead rather than with the screen and on the keyboard.
but im here updating today. XD
flashback to sunday shall we?
spent the day with mr ivan.
lol. actually i dont usually go out during weekends ehh.
but because it was the last dy of his holiday, we went out, like finally.
first stop- vivo city.
i cant even remember when i last been there.
but the last time i went, part of it's still under construction.
so you can imagine how long i havent step foot into vivo.
and if you're wondering why vivo, it's because ivan, being an awesome friend,
wanted to help his friend and her class check into a chalet @ sentosa,
which supposedly require the help of someone >17.
his friend's 16 btw.
yeahh, so i became the awesomest friend that day, to acc a friend to help his friend.
hahaha.
so while waiting for his friend and her friends to arrrive,
we had starbucks.
my first-ever starbucks^^
he intro something to do with mocha, milk and ice.
i dont remember the name luhh.
the names of iceblended drinks in coffeebean are way shorter.
anw, it was pretty darn good, better than many others i drank before.
two thumbs-up XD
and so after meeting up with his friend,
we headed down to sunny sentosa!
first, we took yellow line then change to blue line.
that's not the end. we gotta walk up a slope to get to the chalet- coasta sands btw.
then he suddenly turned to me and say: "i remember last time book coasta sands no need >17 lehh."
LOL. and so he was right.
end up really no need him check in for them lol. >.<
but i was rather happy though.
cause it's been awhile since i went into sentosa.
and i passed by the merlion 4 times that day- which means i took 4 buses in total. T.T
p.s! i just realised qian also went sentosa that day.
hahaha pity we didnt met.
anw, after that also quite late le so we had to put off the supposed trip to town.
that's the reason we came out actually- he wanted to get clothes and also my christmas prezzie hahaha.
it's essential that he buy on the spot so i can get to choose lol.
but due to the shortage of time, my present was put on hold also.
and then, for some reason, we mrt-ed to dolby gaut in order to take the 174 bus back to jurong.
i wanted to head down to qian's place to deliver her present.
the bus ride was incredibly long ehh.
but that allowed us to talk longer.^^
yeahh he sent me home afterthat though his stomach was impatient.
took 185.
i think this is the first time i took so many buses at one go.
bussick X_X

as for monday,
i woke up at 6 plus to see andy&alicia off to school.
first day mahh.
hahaha. yeahh i know i know. im awesome. XD
but i went back to sleep afterthat lol.
then woke up at 8 plus cause of another appointment,
this time with vanice and wendy!^^
breakfast @ jp mac then kboxing @ jurong safra.
photos to be uploaded by vanice first.
and kudos to vanice for being the only one who brought a cam, but a batt-dying one at that.
Lol.
after play, there's work.
job interview for a student care centre.
and that marks the end of my monday!

tuesday!
i think i had the sweetest dream ever in the history of sweet dreams.
but that's not the main point lahh.
time to spend time with my mum!
had breakfast with her @ jp kfc.
real good, rather than always having mac, which i had this morning hahaha.
i love the scrambled eggs btw.
then we went shopping- for groceries.
but not before my abu got me a pair of shoes. XD
i've got to say i've got the most incredible mother ever.
not because of the stuff she buys for us, but for the stuff she does for us.
she's willing to spend everything on us but unwilling to give herself $ for just one blouse.
i decided there and then to give her another $100 for her pathetic wardrobe when i get my pay.

yepp, im holding on to a job now.
somehow, it feels like a burden to me.
studying is way better.
if money will just fall from the sky...
but as Criss Angel puts it,
There is no substitute for hard work.
dangg.
i shall just end here then.
it's sucha long one already,
which means i wont be updating for awhile lol.
ciaos.

i love every moment together

-With All My Heart, Alina ;